"Be that as it may, my Father knows best, and I'm confident that He has placed me here; my task is to labor quietly until the pillar cloud removes and leads farther, working out God's purposes in God's time." -Jim Elliot


Match Made in Heaven

We have waited over 9 months to say these words...we are MATCHED!!!  We laid eyes on our daughter, Selah Grace AnLi, for the first time on February 24, 2014 when our agency sent us her profile to review.  They say that you just "know".  I get it now.  Her big, beautiful, brown eyes looked right into our hearts.  God gave me instant affections for her, and my mama heart just knew that she was ours'.  Looking at her picture was like coming home.  

We got the news today that we have been officially "locked" in the database by CCCWA with AnLi's file.  What an incredibly overwhelming feeling!  It was in this moment that we realized we are truly pursuing this child with reckless abandon.  It just feels amazing to pursue her in the way God has called us to...to be her family for life!!!  The next step in the process is to wait on our Letter Seeking Confirmation (LSC) which will be our next huge step towards having our daughter in our arms.  It has been incredible to contemplate how God used many different things to bring this little girl to us.  There were different delays and "pauses" that happened over the last nine months to bring us to the "ready" place when she was "ready".  This is how God orchestrates bringing families together through adoption.  Before one day came to be, He knew it all.  It is all grace.  Once again, I am taken back to Psalm 139 in all of its splendor.  "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.  Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.  How precious to me are your thoughts, God!  How vast is the sum of them!  Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand--when I awake, I am still with you."  (Psalm 139:13-18)  This match was truly made in heaven, before one of our days came to be.    

There is so much to share about this incredible little girl, and yet we have to wait to disclose details until we receive our Letter of Approval from China (LOA).  At that point, we will be able to share her location, pictures, etc to our hearts' content!!!  In the meantime, it has been so sweet to watch our boys really begin to bond with their sister.  From putting their "Sissy" doll in a car seat, to taking her for a ride in their toy airplane, to Bryson begging to watch the slideshow of her pictures everyday, it has been such a beautiful process to watch them long for her as we do!  Here is a sneak peek into a conversation I had with Bryson last week over lunch:

Bryson: "I want to watch sissy."
I think, of course! Even if he wants to watch a slide show of her pics during lunch, I don't want to discourage any step in bonding that is attempted.
Me: "Ok! You can watch Selah's video."
Bryson sits mesmerized by each picture, intermittently exclaiming, "That's MY sissy!!!" with a big smile on his face.
Me: "Yep buddy, Selah is your sissy."
Bryson: "Mom, you go get sissy. I stay with Nanny and Pop."
I think things are starting to connect.
Me: "Daddy and I will go in a plane to China to get sissy Selah, and you will be with Nanny and Pop. But it will be awhile until we get to do that."
Bryson picks up the iPhone playing the video.
Bryson: "Sissy, come home."
And then he kissed her picture on the screen.
These are the beautiful moments that will get us through this time of waiting to be with our sweetpea across the sea.  

In the meantime, we have a range of emotions moment-by-moment.  Everything from excitement of being one step closer, to grief of not being able to hold her and comfort her, to everything in-between.  This song called "Amos Story" helps to put into words where we are right now emotionally in the wait.  Please continue to pray for our family as we are on this journey to Selah!

(For mobile devices, go to: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4eZybIXpm8)

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